where waves grow sweet

Knowing that she will get a treat if she stops barking, Sunny, our family dog, often now regulates herself without the once-necessary command and then races to find me for her reward. There are times when she doesn’t utter a single noise before her self-control sets in, but there are plenty of other times when it takes her a number of barks to remember her training and seek out her reward. Because of the latter, more frequent scenario, Chase recently told me he thought this approach was rewarding her for barking and was therefore reinforcing the opposite behavior I wanted.

The same could be said for my approach with Sunny’s affinity for dashing out the front door. I’d love to say she comes back the moment I call her, but that’s rare. More often than not, she does some zoomies around the front yards of a few neighbors, picks one to pee on and then heeds my call, at which time, despite the belated obedience, she is rewarded. 

Chase’s viewpoint is totally understandable and maybe he is right, but the way I see it is that Sunny probably isn’t going to grasp the nuances of how many barks are acceptable before choosing to stop or how much time or distance she can spend away from our front door before coming back.. yet, anyway. She needs it kept simple. If she stops barking at any point, yay! If she comes back to me, it’s a win! Her delayed obedience isn’t a cause for shame, which is an ineffectual tool that creates separation, but a reminder that she needs ongoing training which can’t help but draw us closer and reinforce what is good. But of course, she doesn’t need to know any of that… just that it is a joyful thing to return to me.

I think God takes a very similar approach with us. He doesn’t condemn us for all the things we are getting wrong or how delayed we are in the responses that bless us, others and Him, but He celebrates every single moment we choose to turn toward Him and what He has taught us. “Yay!,” He might say. “That’s a win!” There are certainly consequences that can happen as a result of our choices, just like the possibility of Sunny getting hit by a car when she’s racing around, but there is no longer any shame attached. Any poor choices simply point to an area where we lack understanding and need a bit more training, but we don’t even need to grasp that. All we need to know is that, no matter where we have been or for how long or why, there joy every time we return to Him.

So now there is no condemnation for those who belong to Christ Jesus. Romans 8:1