where waves grow sweet

I’ve been doing a bible study at my church on the covenant and it has been one of those transformational kinds of things. Not like “Oh that’s interesting!”, only to forget about it a day later. But where I am understanding how irrevocable the forgiveness is that Jesus purchased for me and how freely I can now come before God on Jesus’ merit alone, not mine. I’m also grasping that he didn’t suffer so he could have perfect, well-behaved Christians , but so he could have unencumbered relationship with us flawed “kids” he loves so darn much.

Hopefully someday I can better articulate the fullness of what I’ve learned, but for the moment what I want to share is that I have felt loved. Not with a sweet little pat-on-the-head kind of love. But with a wild, true, immutable love… a “never stopping, never giving up, unbreaking, always and forever love.”* It has been lifting the weight of performance I didn’t even know I was carrying. I couldn’t be more grateful to be entering more completely into God’s abundant heart for me (and all His kids).

The most interesting thing is happening as a result. I want to share that love in tangible, sometimes inconvenient ways. Not out of duty or obligation or because it makes me feel like a good person. But because it is the only possible response to being loved like this. Having always struggled with selfishness and the proclivity to put my own needs first, this is fairly new ground for me. Don’t get me wrong; it’s not like I was totally evil before and have now turned into Mother Theresa – or even my own very selfless mother. But I have found myself not only willing, but eager, to see beyond my own wants and needs. Not for my own benefit, but for the benefit of others. Because Jesus loves me. And because he loves them. And that is simply the best news ever.

There are some other things I’m tempted to share alongside this, but I think I’m going to save those for another post. What I want to leave with you is this… If you’ve been burdened with selfishness like me or a lack of grace for those around you or you just feel like you have nothing to give, may I suggest that maybe it’s not about trying to give more or become this person you think you should be, but about asking God to show you His love for you and letting that become a fountain that bubbles up from within and flows out onto those around you?

Anyone who believes in me may come and drink! For the Scriptures declare, “Rivers of living water will flow from his heart.” John 7:38

*One of my favorite quotes from The Jesus Storybook Bible